Wednesday, May 10, 2017

May 2017

Dear Oliver,

I can't believe there are only a couple of weeks left of school before summer and then you will be a second grader! Time is going by so quickly. 

Such a cute kid! 7 years old March 2017

Things have been pretty challenging this year. You have a lot of strong emotions that are difficult to control. It's difficult to see you so upset and hurting so consistently. You get very angry and frustrated, especially at me. This year we have seen several professionals. You are currently in group therapy with some other kids your age, and you seem to enjoy it. Weekly topics include things like understanding others' feelings, controlling emotions, speaking kindly, etc. I am trying so hard to help you but feel like I fall short a lot. You get really upset at me and say things I know you don't mean. Almost daily. ("I know you're in my heart but I feel like I don't love you." "I didn't even miss you that much when I was on the campout.") Tonight as I tucked you into bed, you sat up on your knees and said, "I'm sorry" and gave me a hug. The other night, you yelled at me that you hate me and that I'm the worst mom ever. The next morning, you said, "Sorry I yelled at you. I just lost my mind." Sometimes there is contention between us and things are hard but I hope you know I love you so much and would do anything for you. I see so many strengths in you: you are caring, sensitive, smart, thoughtful (you often get something extra for Josh when you get something for yourself), you love to draw, you are social and friendly, you are kind to animals, outgoing and fun, your go-to in times of distress is to pray for help.  

Pictures from Easter a few weeks ago:

Pictures from Easter: 

Keeping it real. :)

I love you Buddy!

Love, Mom

Sunday, February 5, 2017

January 2017

  • I introduced you guys to the Beatles' music. Later, when I put the cd on again, you said, "Oh yeah, is this the caterpillar one?" Pretty cute. 
  • January 12, 2017 is a very prominent day in our family. This is the day we found out we're having twins! We knew we had a baby on the way but had no idea there were two in there. You are excited and hope it's a boy and a girl so you can have another brother and sister. 
The ultrasound picture from 1/12/17. 

An updated picture from last week. I love how it looks like Baby B is waving.

  • One night, you came upstairs and brought me two raviolis on a plate. "One for each baby!" you said. Sweet boy.
  • The other day you said to me, "Mom, you're my BFF." It was so sweet and made me smile. 
  • You've been meeting with a therapist, David, who specializes in helping kids manage their anger and emotions. I think it is helping. You seem to like meeting with him and especially that it's just us going to the appointments (I don't bring the other kids). 
  • You helped Dad lay synthetic grass in our backyard last month. This was Dad's Christmas present to me. It looks so good! 

You and Josh with our neighbor, who helped with the grass. 

  • You love bike rides with Dad, or even on your own down to the corner and back. You love riding your bike.
  • You are doing great in school. We're proud of you. We love you!

Love, Mom

Friday, December 30, 2016

Overdue for an update

Dear Oliver,

This update is long overdue.


  • I asked you and Josh to put the cushions back on the couch. You said to Josh, "We will listen to Mom for she is our captain." That made me laugh.
  • One day you exclaimed to me, "Norah is so cute how she has one little eye and one normal eye. We're lucky!" That melted my heart and brought a huge smile to my face. 
  • One day when you were feeling frustrated, you exclaimed, "I hate patience!" 
  • You accidentally kicked your ball into the neighbor's yard. When we went to get it, you saw they were hispanic and said "Gracious" when they handed it to you instead of "Thank you." I thought that was pretty awesome. 
  • You started meeting with a Psychologist, Dr. Prince, at the end of this month. You have difficulty controlling your emotions and get angry a lot. We want to help you so we're trying this out. You seem to like meeting with him. It seems like you appreciate that we are trying to help you. You liked your first meeting with him and especially liked our 1:1 time together afterward for ice cream. 
  • When I was volunteering in your classroom recently, your teacher, Mrs. Feerer, asked me if you're a vegetarian. You had apparently told your teacher and classmates that you're a vegetarian because you like vegetables. :) You definitely eat meat (even though I don't eat much of it myself) but I love that you love veggies too. You're such a great eater. I'm so proud of you. 
Eleanor gets so excited when she gets to see you after school. She loves you. 
Captain Hook, a pirate and Tinkerbell

Carving pumpkins with Grandma & Grandpa Schultz

You lost your second tooth on Halloween. Very exciting!

  • In one of your prayers this month, you said, "We're thankful for freedom, for our flag, for our country, for bugs, and people to play with." That made me smile.
  • I asked you if you wanted Puffins (cereal) for breakfast. You replied, "Puffins just aren't my thing." 
  • When you were frustrate with me one day, you said, "You and me have a hard time on earth." It makes me sad that we sometimes have conflict and get frustrated with each other but on the other hand, I love your eternal perspective in this statement. I hope you know how much I love you, no matter what, even when we have hard days. 

Sunday, August 14, 2016

To the one like me...

My wonderful, determined, smart, happy, charismatic, energetic, creative, outgoing, faith-filled sensitive and I, we don't always get along as well as I would like. We are both "strong-willed," which I like to call determined, in our ideas and desires. Sometimes we both struggle with patience. We honestly butt heads a lot due to this. Today you lied to me (twice), which is frustrating since we've talked a lot about it lately. I didn't let you play outside for a while afterward, on account of the lying, and you were pretty upset about it. You told me you hate being around me and then slammed the baby gate and some doors. You later told me you wish you had a stepmom. I don't think you meant it in a hurtful way but it did sting a little. Tonight as I tucked you into bed, you told me you were sorry for being rude and disrespectful today. That is another thing we have in common, sweet boy. We always say we're sorry. You put your arms around my neck and told me you want me to stay close to you. I told you I thought you hated being around me. You told me you didn't mean to say that, which of course I know you didn't. I told you I'm going to Utah tomorrow on an airplane with Joshua and Eleanor and you and Daddy will drive there to meet us in a few days (for you cousin, Cassidy's wedding). Your eyes filled with tears as you told me you don't want me to go and you will miss me. I know you love me and I certainly love you so much. The days can definitely be difficult but I am so very grateful you're my boy. I hope you know that. I am trying to teach you about respect, responsibility, patience, faith, kindness, as well as the educational things you need to know. I'm helping you with piano lessons and reading and adding in some play time for chasing and tickling. Sometimes we both get frustrated and lose our patience. Sometimes we need our space. But I'm grateful you're ours, buddy. I feel incredibly blessed.

A couple of weeks ago you started first grade. It's hard to believe in some ways. I love your happy, confident smile. You are enjoying school, including getting back to schedules and routines. You're growing up, little friend. You have so many wonderful things ahead of you. I'm so excited for your future!

I love you,

Thursday, June 30, 2016

Oliver quotes: April / May / June

  • "Wait, what's the plan again?"
  • "Who can say 'It's not a competition first?' I win!"
  • Oliver: "Alta no me gusta." Josh: Alomonyguska!"
  • You gave me a knowing look and said, "I know, I'm tired too."
  • You went on a Father/Son Campout with Daddy and when you came back, I was at your cousin, Isabel's, High School Graduation Party. You left me a sweet note on the counter and the next day you told me, "My heart felt cracked when I wasn't with you. I missed you so much." 

  • "What if you die and daddy dies? Can I have your phones?" 

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

March 2016

  • The other day you said something and then said, "Do you want to write that down?" You know I am a documenter. :) 
  • The other day, you said to me, "When I grow up, I want to marry you." 
  • We had a fun time at the Children's Museum when you had a day off from school this month. We went with your friend Linken. You love it there. 

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Happy 6th Birthday!

Dear Oliver,

Lately I've been thinking about how you're growing up so quickly. You will be six tomorrow, which is so hard to believe. It seems like you were just three. That was such a difficult year for both of us...such a huge learning curve in parenting for me, both of us learning what it meant for me to be home with you instead of at work during the day, me falling into my parenting style (not so gracefully), you testing boundaries at every turn, both of us butting heads a lot. And now, you're such a big boy! You're in full-day Kindergarten, you can read(!), you leave me little notes all the time (they melt my heart), you are such a great big brother to Eleanor, you are (usually) a good example to Josh, you make your dad and I laugh and smile and beam with pride a lot. You are getting notes from girls (this just started last week and you received three - each from a different girl), you are learning so much (it was fun to go to your student-led parent-teacher conference last week), and I can see how your friends are becoming a big part of your life.

Today I picked you up early from school because you had a fever. You were ready to go to bed at about 6:00 pm and wanted me to carry you up to bed. Not so easy to do these are more than half my height and weigh 42 pounds. As I (somewhat awkwardly) carried you up the stairs to your room, I thought back to when I would carry you as a baby. It seems like such a long time ago in some aspects but was really not that long ago at all. And as I look ahead, I realize in two short years you will be baptized, and then 10 years after that you will be old enough to serve a mission. I can't really think that far ahead in too much detail right now...I just have to focus on the here an now. But I did get choked up while watching a tv show the other night with your dad. We're on season 6 of this series and in this episode, the son is leaving for college and the mom is standing in the doorway of his room, reflecting on the past several years with her son. She gets a little emotional. I started crying, which made your dad get teary as well. I'm glad we still have many years with you here in our home before you are off on your own adventures.

I hope you always know how much I love you and how amazing you are. Even if you ever make choices that might not be the best, I will always be right here. Happy birthday, buddy. We are blessed to have you in our family.

Love, Mom

Today I read Dr. Suess books to you in bed (in honor of his birthday, which falls on the same day as yours). I know you're sick when I mention presents and you don't show any interest. :(